*||-s.w.e.e.t.d.r.e.a.m.s-||* i am in d r e a m l a n d `

the girl in dreamland

Friday, April 08, 2005

hellos.
the world goes round
yet another passes
here i am typing away
all these words typed out
some of which makes no sense at all
but who cares?
now that you're gone.
i won't give a damn anymore.
thinking back.
i should not give the helping hand at all
i was wrong.soo wrong
i should have let you walk on ur own
knowing that you have no strength left
i should have jus let go
even though i knew u can't hold on.
but i did nothing of that
i held on
i had hopes
i had dreams
life is full of miracles
i keep telling myself this
i can't give up
i needa go on`
go on~
but in the end
it was you hu left me
know its me hu can't get up
can't breathe
can't think.
you left me here.
alone now~
i hate you!
but i know hating would get me to nowhere
with all my heart i'm sorry
i can't make u stay
i'm sorry i can't let you see
i'm sorry i you can't see what i did
so with all my heart
i forgive you~

* sumtyms ppl you helped and acred can't see the kindness you gave 'em -

but no matter how u hate or dislike that particular someone.we should all try to forgive and try hard to forget even though forgetting is sumtink very difficult to do`

memories.sumtyms.jus.makes.u.emotional~~

i am lost in sweet dreams at 9:12 PM

Friday, April 01, 2005

i feel such a connection even thou you'resoo far away~

hellos =) dear diary` i jus woke up.feelin quite weird and i dunno why! hmm sms-in yifang chattin wif ang online listenin to alicia keys.which cd i've not gif bak to cass. double sorry to her~
hmms. okays~ wat is there to blog? i've got nth ~ no mood! my mum have a hard time smsin.soo pathetic.dots!!! so okays last nite i could not log int o msn.ass! humf` sheesh! yeah i've got one more thing to complain.guides!! sobs.. so mani thingys to do.jess head so heavy! and she's under stress.hmms` sooooo mani things to plan for da steppin down sia~ gawds! helmme.and there's my studies! wtf! why mus schu be ike dis.exams exams exams.. ass all da examinations.stippit la! okays end it here.really pissed jus mentionin the word exams.cya~

i am lost in sweet dreams at 7:15 PM

Saturday, March 26, 2005

finally a day with ESHLYN `

hellos people~ omg` i finalli met up wif bestie fren eshlyn lim xing jie. hey see! i can remember ur name too apart from xavier. lols. yays for carmella.of cos la rite~ i BETTER remember if not u hack me to pieces yeah? hees. okays anyway today " date" was kinda last minute thingy. My mum told me to clean my room and was allowed to go.aww~ hehes. Eshlyn has gr0wn prettier >.< mwahahas. am i liek suan-ing you? who knows? whoops =x kk` we watched ms congeniality 2 today!!!!!!! that show was friggin coool and rawkin sia. never regretted spending my precious 8.50 on da tickets.hehes. was funny too. sandra bullock looks like ethelyn!!! eshlyn's sis. they all got da ang moh pattern.lucky la.hahas~ the way sandra bullock walks too reminded me of ethelyn. hehes. =) kk we shopped too and ate ! =p heees` umms my 50 bucks was gone in an like 2 hours time =x big spender rites? haiis.wat to do?! wan pamper myself. hahahas~ sound so pathetic. aiyohs carmella~ tomolo's easter sunday! happy easter sunday to you guys.hugs and kisses =p hmm k later i shall list what i spend my money on. soo grrrs. kk choo yeow jus called me go see elix taggi board. sumtink baaad must have happen. sorry for the interruption.gotta end it here. k i shall list what i bought~

the girl spended on.
* bum collar tees - 20.80 bucks
* food - bout 12 bucks?
* tickets 8.50`
* ear studs - 5 bucks
* mag - 3 bucks

resulting me in no money to buy my cds!!!! growls!!! =(

i am lost in sweet dreams at 7:07 AM

Friday, March 25, 2005

the` EYE 10 ~!! bo0!

hihi =p ... hehes preety lame title yaa i know.jus shuttupp wif ur comments kay?! hahas =x whoops!

hmm went to watch the eye 10 today wif a couple of secondary schu buddies >.< thou =")" creepy ="x" hehes ="x" hearts ="D" popcorns =")">.< hanki =")" steady ="D" hehes ="x" guys ="p" you ="p" fwensforever =")">

*carmella finally watched a horror film wif her buddies >.< -
250305~ weeeee!

i am lost in sweet dreams at 7:57 AM

Thursday, March 24, 2005

jus freak out let it go`

hellos people!

firstly~ i wanna scream this : i did not finish my standerdise test!!!! sumone up there save me =) please.

okays` hmm todae eh? well woke up damn friggin early.was yawnin like mad =p for the sake of my lil sister! what a great sister i am to scarifice my sleep time for her =) better be appreciative cassandra teigh! lols. anyways reached mac ritchie where my dad drop my sis off she was had her cross country todae and was expected to be there at 6.45 . oh well she was early` 6.35 exactly.hahas.we saw no souls at mac ritchie.duh its six in da mornin.hello! hahas. then suddenly saw a girl standing there.a pathetic soul.waiting i guess? hmm as we go further up faces appaered . people bustling around~ guess was the counsellors preparing for the run.Drop sis off.it was preety dark` there spoooky and also scary too cos there was a rape incident happen there~ who0ps`! then proceed to my school! was kinda early.Earlier than usual. -.-'' dots is all i say. Dad dropped me off at zebra crossin there where yang sheng was handling the traffic.hees =) okays~ then i crossed the road reached sch. damn locker area was light-less!! i can't see the locker no. properly !arses! there was caning today.sigh another one~ i'm beggining to get used to it.why can't they jus obey.grrs.hmm hais life was same old thing.study study scold scold.SAME! mdm goh flared up today.sent daryl out of da class. hais` she told us we were'nt clever.no one in this school is. those hu scores high marks is due to hardwork! one big fat word to her oh plus 3 words behind. WADEVER. kiss my ass~! hmf` was over there giving the stupid face to her! rollin my eyes.un-noticed =) teachers~ sumtyms are such nags! eews! i jus wanna punch 'em all down rid 'em all. =x guess i can't ,its just beyond me.useless me. well did not finish stand test today.scared. i'm feelin down cos of this. =( grrs. sumtyms when i daydream or my mind jus go blank ... i'd fill my mind wif questions.floodin it with lotsa why?! why me?! why am i here? hmm these questions.... then i reflect back and asked myself do i sound self-centered?! when i told my parents once that i took a test and it showed tt i was self-centered sadly they agreed.Their answer to me was even... u finally realised it! it shocked me~ why did no one mention it earlier on?! i was a fool ain't i?! i smiled at 'em those kindaf half smile.and said really? when my heart was actually breaking inside.blood triklin down slowly and endlessly.that was how i felt.miserable.hmm maybe also cos of other stuffs.The pain was slow and it pricked me hard.sighs`i feel so confuessed sumtimes. i just can't tell which are lies and which are truths. feel useless.well i am ~ hahas.to think i still can laugh.argh wadever carmella.smile! =) okays. we must be happy . those hu are having a bad day ... jus wanna say think positive out there ... sumwhere someone's thinking of ya ~ remember this and kip ur soul alive =) dream on. kk i'll end this here. mwacks~ hugs + kisses nites` the cup is half full =p not half empty yeahs?! lets do this together walk the rocky road of life together with a undying spirit.we can do it.

= only love can say
= try again or walk away
=but i believe for you and me
= that the sun will shine one day
= iso i jus play my part
= pray that you'll have a change of heart
= but i can`t make you see it thru
= tts onli sumtink love can do`

nice song yeah?!?! mwaccks~ love? hah! tell-me the true meaning =)

i am lost in sweet dreams at 8:52 AM

Thursday, March 17, 2005

way away~~*

hellos.feeling sick! the feeling totally sucks. i can't breathe properly.i cant taste properly. this is a major problem for a girl who loves to eat .. i can't taste my favorite food properly n0w. suckie eh? yaaa.. i can hear properly too. so pardon me askin HUH. okays? hehes at least now i've got an excuse when my dad calls me 2 or 3 times and me not ans him.kk evil me. yesterday? well its alite. woke up in da morning.... went to compass to eat cos` sis meeting fwens at liabary. yarr then me? well i went to sheena's house. i was the FIRST. cheers! okays... so then i played wif her hamster tiny. so cute~ hahas. girls~ hmm waited for jurene.ruoping and jessebelle. hours flew by and finally jurene came. then hours flew by again ruoping and jess appeared. hahas! then we started doin the badge thingy. accident prevention. hahas~ kk then we half watch tvee half do our thing. hmm. in teh end we completed the points but have not drawn those pics and too bad i've gotta go. after that` i went to funeral. don't wish to talk bout hu`s funeral laa. stayed till 12 ++ then went home. and boom once i'm home~ i changed. make me bed. and went under the covers and start to snore... waiting for the next day to come. and here i am~ hees`

i am lost in sweet dreams at 8:15 PM

Tuesday, March 15, 2005

s ii c k l ii e - M ee * my week is -H.o.r.R.i.b.L.e-

hello.people.sorry for the wait yarr >.<

life is a mess now. i feel awful.

throat is pain.head feels heavy eyeballs dry ... everything seemed to be spinning

yeah... but i still can TYPE gawwd... holidays equals broing!

haas! k anyways. was browsin frensterr ~

i linked from here to there and saw alot of girl picture.whoa some uploaded 11 pics and the pics included nothing other than their face.

gosh i wonder what they wanna prove man~ guess they're afraid they aren't preety enuff for the world ehh?

i missed a-math lesson todae part of me HAPPY cos i get to skip the boredom.ohh save me. and anotha part of me feel awfuul cos of the sickness.growls~

stupid weather ; stupid everything!!

i'm listening to purfect 10 now feeling pathetiic. dotss...

hahas~ traalalalala. i'm so0n gonna get my butt out of this chair and fetch mua lil sis.

my lil sis went to ask for donations today wonderr how did it went.lols.can't wait to hear her stories. =p blehhs.

oh yaa i bought yellow card cd.woo0o0o0o0o0o0ts~!!

cds wiishliist`
1) ashlee simpsons autobiography
2) good charlotte the young and the hopeless
3) linsay's speak! *
4) eminen encore~ *
5) jojo [ hmm still consideriing`]
6) usher~

the one wif * is i wann alott~ hahas. =)

k i shall end here. i'll be right here waiting for youu`

i'm.a.girl.without.powerrs`
but.i.do.have.dreams`
and.one.of.'em.is...
to.see.your.smile.again~
i.miss.you.soo.muuch~

i am lost in sweet dreams at 10:04 PM